wedding may 10.
4 weeks out.
A’s bachelorette party this weekend.
the weekend plan #
friday-saturday (april 11-12):
A. and 6 girlfriends.
temecula wine country.
friday: winery tour, dinner.
saturday: spa day, more wine.
her cost: $600
my weekend:
trade normally.
8 guys coming over saturday night (pre-bachelor party hangout).
order pizza, watch fights.
friday night (april 11) #
A. left 2pm:
packed bag, excited.
kissed me goodbye.
A.: “you’re really not worried?”
me: “nope. have fun. don’t get too drunk.”
A.: “no promises.”
me: “fair.”
my friday:
traded normal (2 trades, 1 win, 1 loss, +$140 net).
ordered thai food.
played video games.
A. texted 9pm:
“wine is good. miss you already.”
me: “miss you too. have fun.”
A.: “love you.”
me: “love you.”
first time apart since we lived together 18 months ago.
felt weird.
saturday (april 12) #
trading:
3 trades, 3 wins (+$1,240).
best day since february.
VIX stable 16.8, conditions perfect.
afternoon:
8 guys came over for fights.
ordered 6 pizzas.
beer, ufc, shit-talking.
bachelor party preview logistics:
next weekend (april 18-19).
friday: gaslamp bar crawl, strip club.
saturday: topgolf, brewery tour.
everyone confirmed.
A. texted 6pm:
“spa was amazing. getting drunk now.”
me: “nice. guys are here watching fights.”
A.: “don’t burn the house down.”
me: “no promises.”
A.: “lol. love you.”
guys noticed:
J.: “you two are disgustingly cute.”
me: “fuck off.”
J.: “seriously though, she’s great. don’t fuck it up.”
me: “not planning to.”
saturday night #
A. got home 11pm:
drunk, happy, tired.
A.: “i missed you so much.”
me: “missed you too.”
A.: “did you have fun with the guys?”
me: “yeah. talked bachelor party logistics.”
A.: “you better not do anything stupid next weekend.”
me: “define stupid.”
A.: “you know what i mean. strip club is fine. no touching. no private dances. no numbers.”
me: “already agreed. just looking.”
A.: “good. because i trust you but i’ll also cut your dick off.”
me: “noted.”
sex:
she was drunk, horny, demanding.
A.: “bedroom. now.”
rode me hard.
came twice.
passed out after.
places list: didn’t add (just bedroom, normal).
sunday morning (april 13) #
A. hungover:
spent morning on couch.
told me about weekend.
highlights:
wine tasting was fun (tried 12 wines, bought 3 bottles).
spa day incredible (massage, facial, mani/pedi).
dinner saturday night (her friends grilled her about me).
her friends’ questions:
“is he really the one?”
“are you sure about getting married at 26?”
“what if you get bored?”
A’s answers:
“yes, he’s the one.”
“age doesn’t matter when you know.”
“we won’t get bored. our sex life is incredible and we communicate.”
me: “you told your friends about our sex life?”
A.: “of course. they wanted details.”
me: “what did you tell them?”
A.: “everything. bondage, dom/sub, places list, how open we are.”
me: “and they said?”
A.: “they’re jealous. most of them have boring vanilla sex.”
me: “places list is 42 and counting.”
A.: “i know. we’re adding to it tonight when i’m not hungover.”
what weekend taught #
1. trust works both ways
she went to wine country with girlfriends.
i had guys over for fights.
neither worried.
2. communication is everything
A. set clear rules for bachelor party.
i agreed without argument.
boundaries respected.
3. missing each other = good sign
first weekend apart in 18 months.
both texted “miss you” multiple times.
relationship solid.
4. her friends approve
grilled her about marriage.
she defended us confidently.
external validation nice but unnecessary.
bachelor party next weekend #
april 18-19:
8 guys.
friday: gaslamp bar crawl, strip club (no touching, just looking).
saturday: topgolf, brewery tour.
A’s rules:
no touching strippers.
no private dances.
no getting numbers.
back by midnight saturday.
me: “all agreed.”
A.: “good. have fun. i trust you.”
me: “i know.”
trading impact weekend #
friday-saturday:
5 trades total.
4 wins, 1 loss.
+$1,380 net.
best weekend since february.
VIX stable, conditions perfect.
no distraction from A. being gone.
focused on trading, made money.
therapy this week #
session wednesday (april 9):
dr. r: “bachelorette party this weekend. how do you feel?”
me: “fine. she’s going to wine country with friends. i trust her.”
dr. r: “no anxiety about her being away?”
me: “nope. she’s not going to do anything. neither am i during bachelor party.”
dr. r: “bachelor party next weekend. strip club involved?”
me: “yeah. A. said it’s fine as long as no touching.”
dr. r: “and you agreed?”
me: “yeah. i’m going because my friends want to go. i’m not interested in strippers. i have A.”
dr. r: “secure attachment.”
me: “took 18 months but yeah.”
tonight (april 13, 1:55am) #
bachelorette weekend done.
A. had fun wine country (spa, wine, girlfriends).
i traded well (+$1,380), had guys over saturday.
first weekend apart 18 months.
both missed each other.
trust working both ways.
bachelor party next weekend (april 18-19).
strip club friday (no touching), topgolf saturday.
wedding 4 weeks out.
relationship solid.
1:55am sunday. bachelorette weekend complete. A. wine country temecula april 11-12 (6 girlfriends, spa, wine tasting, $600). i traded normally fri-sat (5 trades, 4 wins, +$1,380 best weekend since feb). first weekend apart 18 months, both texted “miss you” multiple times. saturday 8 guys over watching fights, bachelor party logistics confirmed. A. home 11pm drunk happy, sex (rode me hard, came twice). sunday morning hungover, told me her friends grilled her about marriage (she defended us confidently). bachelor party next weekend april 18-19 (strip club friday no touching, topgolf saturday). wedding 4 weeks. trust working both ways.
-AK